Shake My Funny Maker

This is my first bit of useless info for 2010. I’ve been sitting here wondering why it has taken 10 days to put out a message on the blog called The Daily Deuce. I guess sitting on the couch with one hand tucked in the top of my pants was more appealing. Then again, I’ve never put out a daily blog and when have you met a motivated pot head?

It has also taken me 10 days to balance my checkbook. As you can see I’m starting out on the wrong foot towards saving and making money. I was watching the news and I heard the recession is over. If that’s true, why am I considering work as a male dancer to pay off Christmas gifts? Bown chikka bown bown.

I have 354 more days to work out some creative ways to drum up extra cash this year. The market for a fat, middle aged male stripper is probably non-existent so I’ll have to spend my time on another equally challenging pursuit.

I want to offer additional ethnic television channels. Black people have BET (Black Entertainment Television). That leaves the market wide open for TV networks geared towards ethnic groups.

• HET (Hindu Entertainment Television). Okay, maybe not. HET sounds too much like HATE. The timing for them is a little off right now. Sorry guys.

• LET (Latin Entertainment Television). On second thought, this would probably not work. Equal scheduling would need to be split between Mexicans, Cubans and Puerto Ricans. I know, I know – it was a shock to me too when I found they weren’t the same.

• WET (White Entertainment Television). It kinda sounds like a gay porn variety channel, but I think it would work. After some quick research, I won’t make any money on this one either. I just checked my 248 channels and WET is currently up and running already under a few different names (NBC, ABC, CBS, FOX, LIFETIME, A&E, USA, TNT, TBS etc).

I guess that brings me back to male dancer or pot salesman and I don’t have the mental strength to just sell the pot. I’d have to sample it – daily. Daily samples would lead to zero sales. I saw Scarface “don’t get high on your own supply”.
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I just took a break and looked at my money maker to see if I could make it as a male dancer. I have a beer gut like a pregnant woman in her last trimester and chest and pubic hair thicker than Kimbo Slice’s beard.

I think I have a chance.